someone explain to me...

this is rather random, but i've kinda been mulling over this for a while...

i've never heard a solid explanation for all the persecution of communists (and the social stigma that's been attached to communism since) during the cold war. in all honesty, i sit there (on the bus, in the car, staring blankly at the computer at work) thinking, "what was that all about?". it seems to me like a group of people and a group of countries held a political/governmental ideal for themselves, and they were crushed for it. i understand that communism, at least the examples the world has seen, hasn't worked out all that great, and it is prone to corruption, but isn't democracy just as corrupt? instead of bribes, we call it lobbying. same thing.

So why have communists been persecuted, subjected to wars (not "liberations" mind you), ridiculed, become the but of so many jokes, and demonized? think about this. Jesus was a communist. the disciples were communists. they all lived in a community where they had nothing of their own and shared everything with everyone around them. i understand that cold war communism isn't exactly that, but it's the main ideal isn't it?

i guess it's just a random tangent that i've had in my head for a while. i want to know what you think. leave a comment

somewhat, but not entirely, like a blob

lately, i've been feeling really, really unproductive... it pretty much sucks. i have no classes i like, i got booted out of the one that would have saved my semester (a film class i was on the waitlist for, but didn't get in), and my job is boring (but bearable because of the pay and the long periods of time i'm usually able to be online), and i don't feel like i'm going anywhere.

i need to move on to the next phase of my life. I don't really know what that's going to look like; moving out, getting a job in my career field, something big like that. I do feel like i'm on the verge of something big like that though. I have been looking at apartments with a buddy of mine who wants/needs to move out of his parents house too. i just kinda feel like i'm stuck and i need to grow up some. i get little hints of things to come every once in a while, and i really like it.

let me just give you an example of the extent of my un-productive situation. i've started to compile an excell spreadsheet of all the movies i've ever seen. complete with titles, directors, writers, and release dates. that's right. so instead of listening to my philosophy, weather, or math lectures, i'm perusing IMDB looking for movies i've seen and copying the data in to excell. So far, i'm at around 250... and i've only just scratched the surface...

so, to sum up, i'm bored at life